The Project is the Excuse

When people ask what are some of the things I do at the retirement center, the easiest answer and the technically true one is I help with arts and crafts.

Over the past year, I've helped residents work on all kinds of projects, we made a giant Earth for Earth Day, we made Chinese decorations for Lunar New Year, and we've painted, glued, cut things out and I also fixed things that fell apart.

If someone walked through the art room, they would probably think the goal was to finish whatever project was sitting on the table. However after almost a year of volunteering there every week, I've started to think the project isn't really the point.

The project is the excuse.

The giant Earth gave people something to gather around, the Chinese decorations gave people something to work on together, and the paint, markers, construction paper, and glue created a reason for people to sit at the same table for an hour.

And once people are sitting together, other things start happening.

Stories come out, jokes get repeated, someone remembers something from the week before, someone asks about a grandchild, someone shares a memory connected to the holiday we're celebrating. Sometimes we talk the entire time, sometimes we hardly talk at all but either way, something is being built.

When I first started volunteering, every visit felt a little formal, I wanted to be helpful, but I didn't want to be intrusive, and I wanted to ask questions, but I didn't want it to feel like an interview. Over time, that has changed for me and not because of one important conversation, but because we kept returning to the same table.

We developed routines, people had favorite seats, certain residents always reached for particular supplies, and I learned who liked to paint, who preferred cutting things out, and who mostly came for the conversation. Without really noticing it, we became familiar to one another.

That's what I find interesting from an anthropological perspective, people often think culture is created through big traditions, holidays, and celebrations, however culture is also created through repetition, growing out of small habits and shared experiences.

The art projects are temporary, eventually the Earth Day decorations come down, the Lunar New Year decor gets put away, and the paint dries and the supplies get cleaned up.

What lasts is the relationship that was built while making them.

I used to think volunteering was mostly about helping, however now I think it's also about showing up often enough that people start expecting to see you there. The finished project is nice, however sometimes the most important thing we make isn't sitting on the table when we're done. Sometimes it's the community that forms around it.